Welcome Author Kim Fairley
Kim Fairley is the author of her memoir, Shooting Out the Lights. She has a BFA from the University of Southern California and an MFA from the University of Michigan. Kim is currently am working on a series of short nonfiction pieces. She is also a member of NFAA (Nonfiction Authors Association), NAMW (National Association of Memoir Writers), The Authors Guild, and the Ann Arbor Area Writers.
Welcome Author Kim Fairley
Thank you for being a part of my meet the author series! Could you share something about yourself that no one knows?
Thanks, Alison, for having me. Sure. The first thing that comes to mind is my love of postage stamps. A few years after my husband died, I arrived in Michigan for grad school. I’d already started a large stamp quilt so I brought my stamp collection with me. Professors said, “You’re here to experiment. If you love stamps, make your own stamps, blow them up and make them life-size, but don’t waste your time, sewing stamps together. I took their advice, abandoned the stamps, and developed a body of work using color xerography, for which I’m grateful. Still, my love of postage stamps hasn’t wavered. Whenever I’m in front of the television, watching some program that doesn’t require my complete attention, I pull out my box of stamps, a needle and white thread, and sew.
When did you choose to become a writer and author?
I had always been interested in family history, especially my great grandfather’s 1901 Arctic expedition. By the time I entered grad school, I’d become especially fascinated by the controversy over who made it to the North Pole first. Knowing my great grandfather believed Frederick Cook and doubted Robert Peary, I felt the need to share my great grandfather’s diary and photographs from the expedition. That book, Boreal Ties: Photographs and Two Diaries of the 1901 Peary Relief Expedition got me started as a writer.
How hard did you work to get here?
Writing a memoir is an arduous process. In the beginning, I wrote a few stories, hooked them together with transitions, and thought that was enough. But after sharing the stories with my writing groups, I realized that people who read memoirs are interested in the connection to their own lives. They want to know how the writer’s story overlaps with theirs. And they want to understand why you, the author, made the choices you made. It’s the universal themes that make or break a memoir. And for me, it required a lot of reflection and emotional excavation to uncover those universal themes.
Inspiration for writing Shooting Out the Lights
Your story is extremely thought provoking. It made me see how each of us in many ways carry our history into this present moment. How the choices we make, stem from our experiences and that we live in other people’s expectations.
Thank you. Yes, one of the most difficult aspects of writing a memoir is that it’s necessary to make yourself vulnerable as you write and then you must be vulnerable again when you present the story to the public. It would be nice if we could write about our difficult times and show how we were totally changed by the end, but life is rarely like that. Life is a long process of discovery and how we think about our lives is constantly evolving. But that’s one reason I love memoirs. I love learning about other writers’ discoveries as they wrestle with difficult moments in their lives.
The age difference between you and Vern is amazing. Relationships and connections resonated strongly in your story. What messages do you want readers to embrace in your memoir?
I’m sure many people react to an extreme age gap in a relationship by deciding he or she must be mentally “off” and lack good judgment, or that one must be a gold-digger, or creepy in some way. In my case, we were extremely well-matched. I’m not going to say our relationship was perfect, and that our age gap was not challenging, but we had a beautiful and fulfilling relationship. I felt moved to share the story because I know there are other people who fall in love with partners whom their family and friends may not “approve of” based on myths about age, religion, race, culture, education or social status. I’m hoping to dispel some of those myths.
I hoped readers would understand what I learned about taking responsibility in a relationship, that one person cannot be a caretaker and parent to the other person and at the same time maintain a balance in the relationship. I also wanted to convey some of the wonderful aspects of a small town, where people know each other well and can depend on each other to be there during the difficult times.
How long did you take to complete writing your memoir?
It has taken me twelve years to write two memoirs so I guess it is fair to say that each one took about six years. My next memoir will be out in October of 2022.
What memory in your story brought you joy with writing?
Reading through some of Vern’s old love letters and comic strips brought back some wonderful memories. One of the biggest joys for me was in writing dialogue and getting the voice right. I still hear Vern’s voice in my head, and recreating scenes from the past was extremely enjoyable.
My favourite scene to write was the scene near the end of the book when I drove off to Cincinnati and felt a sense of freedom and appreciation of the landscape along the way. I realized I was recovering a sense of power and balance in the relationship. It felt great to relive it.
When your story becomes a movie, which actresses or actor would you cast to play you and Vern’s roles?
Oh, gosh, somehow, I can’t imagine the story as a movie, but Vern looked a lot like Bryan Cranston. He was handsome, with a good sense of humour, and charismatic. As for me, my siblings always said I reminded them of Diane Keaton in Something’s Gotta Give when she ran across the screen, stark naked, and shrieked. But honestly, I have no idea.
What’s next for Kim Fairley
Is there a continuation or a new story in the making? Could you share a little more of what you plan to write next?
With Shooting Out the Lights, I got the cart before the horse. My childhood story should have come first but for some reason, my Vern story was the first to be finished. So, my next book, called Swimming for My Life, will be out in October of 2022 and it’s about my whacky family and my childhood experience as a competitive swimmer during the early years of Title IX. At the moment, I’m working on a series of micro-memoirs. I have no idea what will come of it, but I’m enjoying the experiment.
What advice would you give anyone wanting to become a writer?
Tell your story in whatever art form appeals to you. If it’s writing, singing, dancing, playing music, making art, live storytelling—whatever it is—tell your story. Even the sad, difficult stories, can connect to other people and make a difference in their lives.
Connect with Kim Fairley
Readers, Kim would love to hear from you. You can connect with her here.
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